Getting real...

This week I was reading Stephanie Howell's blog (this post in particular) and it was like a breath of fresh air. I've often felt the need to sensor myself and separate my scrappy self from the real me.  You never quite know who is reading your blog afterall.  So, in an effort to show that we don't all live in a perfect world, here's a few home truths...

1. Three years ago I lost 40 kg which was awesome and I was looking totally hot. Since then, I've put on 50kg!! Not happy.  Hence the reason you will very rarely see a full body shot of me, and one of the reasons I didn't go to my high school reunion...I just couldn't face it.
2. Weight has been an issue for all of my teen/adult life. I am an emotional eater and I need to stop being the victim and figure out / move on from what I am "feeding". Watching "Ruby" every week has helped immensely. I'm so glad she's telling her story. I feel like I'm wasting my 30's being so overweight. The fashion out there is so nice and I want a part of it.  I have no idea what my style is because there are only a few shops around here that cater to my size, so my style is what I can find to fit me iykwim. Hopefully soon that'll change. Watch this space...
3. I am painfully shy and tend to go about things quietly. I am not one to burst into a room and announce my presence. If you happen to see me at a scrap event, come and say hi because once I get going, I love having a chat! lol.
4. I often doubt my abilities and feel that my work isn't good enough...and I'm always amazed, surprised and happy when my work is picked up for publication, or someone leaves a comment saying that I've inspired them in some way.
5. I'm terrified that my business is not going to be successful. I figure if I love the products I've put together, then there's bound to be someone else out there who loves it too. I haven't set myself a golden number of kits I want to sell and will increase numbers when I'm ready.
6. I was diagnosed with severe depression almost 18 months ago (although its been much longer than that) and have been taking the "yippee" pills ever since. They help. Talking to counselors has also helped, but ultimately I know its up to me. I'm just not ready.  The good days are outnumbering the bad.
7. I love being a mum, but sometimes I need more. I have never wanted to be a stay at home mum. I crave adult conversation too much...and would definitely spend way too much shopping if I were.
8. When my hubby is away for work, I flounder. Andrew is totally my rock.  Sensible Capricorn and highly emotional Pisces...the perfect compliment. He puts up with a lot of foolishness on my part.
9. My house is currently a disorganised, chaotic space worthy of a place on "Clean House". I am not attached to my clutter at all, but I haven't got the energy to deal with it.  If Niecy Nash knocked on my door tomorrow, I would greet her with the biggest hug. I hate having people "drop over"...I need a few hours notice. At the very least, I need to shut my bedroom door to hide the "floordrobe".
10. I spend way too much time on the computer...don't we all? I like it when we go away somewhere that doesn't have access to the internet. The sad thing is, I look at the same sites out there all the time. lol.

There you have it. A little bit about me.  Do yourself a favour and get real too. Its cheaper than therapy! lol.  Thanks for dropping by.

Cheers, Lis.