If you talk about it, will it come true?
I'm just going to put it out there...
I'm afraid that I will always be the size that I am.
My mind is plagued with stupid questions that I have no answer for.
Am I destined to always be the fat chick?
Is this who I'm meant to be?
Is my fat, my "comfort" zone...my defence mechanism?
Is it holding me back from enjoying a full life?
Does it enable me to hide because no one wants to look at me?
What's the worst thing that can happen by losing weight?
What will happen if I don't?
So many "what if's", my head is spinning.
Clearly, the pros outweigh the cons (no pun intended).
Why do I sabotage myself?
Why am I so afraid?
I am trying to push myself.
To better myself.
To not give up.
It's so hard.
So very hard.
I pray that the fear will not win.
Day 7, Tuesday: The thing(s) you're most afraid of